Ladies Room is a series of text conversations that stem from casual discussions among peers. Often such insignificant interactions leave you with significant things to wonder about. The language of this series will be primarily English but often major parts of it just may be in Urdu. Updates are dependent purely open on the frequency of something being considered substantial enough to be put out like this.
_______________________________
Aalu: 😭😭😭😭omg that's so cuteeee.
Me: It's too early in the morning for you too go on attacking around with fiction-gone-real.
Sam: Legit, everyday I expect there to be something different, like maybe there is some space between them while walking, or them not holding hands for a while, but nah, their sides are glued and the hand hold is not even the regular hand hold but every times it's the fingers interlocked one, with her other hand wrapped around his bicep area, and his other hand squeezing a stress ball, while they just have their faces close to one another, staring into each others' eyes and smiling and chatting like they just got married...I AM LIKE PLEASE WHAT IS THIS.
And because they are older, it's more like those fiction scenarios. 🤧
Me: Ma'am I just woke up. Can you NOT, it's too early. 😭
Sam: And it's also like they are lost in their own world while they are walking. They actually don't break the eye lock that easily, they just keep strolling, and I am the one who just steps to the side and gives them time to pass by...and inside I scream like a maniac awed by their cuteness.
Me: Nah I'm just imagining you having a hard time staying 'normal'. Man that's so adorable. 🤧
Sam: I do smile at them, EACH TIME, because I can't help it. Two days ago they were looking at some flowers, hands never leaving each other's. 😭
Me: I'm...oh shutup what AU is this? 🤧
Sam: That kind of casual and cute intimacy at this age just gives such a nice picture of how their younger life and life thus far might have been. They are so comfortable and loving with each other, as though it's habit. These are literally those high school sweethearts types who sustained so far because it was the giddy but pure kind of love I bet.
Aalu: 😭to Much for my heart.
Me: Man I just finished reading an AU and now you come attacking and I'm oh...yeah you know. 😣
Sam: Absolute goals! Ahhh that kind of love, it's so so so so rare to see, especially when people get older. Most just have the kind of marriage where they have been sick and tired of each other since long, and then there is this kind. Where you are like, nah man, I JUST KNOW these two had so much love between them. So whenever I see those rare cases, my heart just bursts.
Me: Ah. What actually is disturbing is the fact that as much as this is all cute and stuff, it stands out this much...why? Because it's not the norm. That shit hurts man.
Sam: EXACTLY! This! Why do you think we are going gaga over it, and why do you think we actually notice and remember it? Because we don't see it, almost ever. So when the very rare scenarios come up, it's the simplest of things but they stand out because we are so used to observing shit otherwise.
Me: THIS. Period. Ugh I really wish people learned to respect others, it's really as simple as that. Everything stems from that one word. It makes you a better human no matter to whom, how, when, where, why and in what sort of a relationship. The fact that this very thing lacks so badly explains a lot about how people fail to acknowledge the bonds they share in any capacity.
Sam: 💯💯💯💯💯 Another thing, desi culture legit shames and looks down upon the most simple and essential forms of showcase of intimacy, always it's sad. Like holding hands, or just looking at each other longingly. These are not 'sexual' stuff. It's just simple forms of expressions of care and love.
Me: They shame you for being a considerate, respectful and sensitive human. That's about it. Apparently dominance is so glorified that the fact that people could just look beyond stubborn ideals and be nice to each other is so RARE. It's really not about PDA. That's always a personal choice and not everyone is comfortable with that. They bring in culture and I'm like sure, even though you as a third person have no right to say anything between two people, sure I understand that to overstep a cultural boundary could be upsetting for you. BUT it's simple as this, it's an excuse. You could be simply a better human to your partner and they'd label you spineless. And for what? For being just caring and expressive. If you have a personal choice to dislike it, others can have a personal choice to like it. They lace it in humour just to keep it less controversial, but that actually makes the mockery more acceptable. And I'm saying this regardless of gender norms. Men get called stuff that makes it seem like they've no 'fake masculinity' if they're a gentle person. Women get called stuff that makes them believe, you need to be intimidated by him 24*7. And the way they bring the Adam Eve creation story and references of who's to "look out" for who. I'm sorry but care and protectiveness have no gender. They come out of genuine affection and that's how it should be taken. Unfortunately it's not. Unfortunately it's associated to gender roles and gender norms that make you forget your partner is a human first and your partner later. You should not be doing something just because they're your partner or not. Your intentions need to be organic, or what's even the point of it all then?
Sam: Ugh ALL OF THIS, just the truth!!
No comments:
Post a Comment